Not a good start

This month is not a good month for me. I thought with a new start of the year, I can start it nicely. But all I feel for this month is like shit. I don't know why I feel so down, like I cannot feel happy. Or maybe I just too focus on the bad times and forgot the good times I had. Hmmmm .... Maybe I should not stress too much about the money. Just start all over again. I'm sure I can save it all again!! And... I always wanna hang out with my poly clique, as in all of them. Even on my birthday I can never really feel happy cuz I feel that my birthday came at a wrong time. I was worrying that they don enjoy. And I really wanna get wishes from all of them. I think I care too much, expect too much? All I wanna is some bday wishes from them. A nice bday card. Cuz I like this kind of stuff. I just love them too much. They are important to me. Right now, I just wanna spend my poly days well with them :X Hmm.. Hope February month is gonna be good. Hope I can feel happy, determined to make my new year resolutions come true. This year I am 19, and I have 19 resolutions hahah. Hope I am able to achieve all! Life is short. So I should be happy, and not sad. Life is beautiful!! JIAYOU TO ME.